Photo by: gkphotos
Some Ways to Handle Physical Contact
by Tiffany Taylor
Touching/physical contact is an absolutely vital component of seduction. You can't successfully pick-up a girl without first establishing a basic level of mutual tactility - I.E. Before you can move in for the kill by kissing and/or sleeping with her, you MUST first have a regular, healthy amount of touching that works both ways: she flirtatiously puts her hand on your knee, you encircle her waist with your arm and pull her a little closer - whatever form the physical contact takes, it has to be present for you to achieve your final goal of actual seduction. And that right there is where the problem for many men lies: how can a guy get the ball rolling when it comes to tactility and physical closeness? If the girl's not being tactile, how can a guy develop mutual physical closeness without freaking her out or scaring her away?
Often men just "go for it" and consequently end up making the girl feel uncomfortable or even slightly violated because of their rushed attempt at physical closeness. Other men decide they don't want to risk putting a girl off, so hold back any kind of touching or bodily contact - doing so usually sends out the wrong message, that the guy is either not interested in the girl, or that he's simply too timid to show it, neither of which are attractive scenarios in the mind of a good-looking, fun-loving girl. Okay, so what's the solution to this awkward problem?
Quite simply, you just need to follow a few basic rules or procedures, all of which conform to the personal boundaries of most girl (and therefore don't appear uncalled for or rushed) but at the same time clearly indicate that you're a confident guy who's not afraid of getting to know girls and even showing it through casual, relaxed physical contact. So, let's take a look.
1. Many men think that touching a girl in any way when they first meet them is an absolute no-no. But that's simply not true. To form a positive, strong first impression and create an immediate bond with a girl when you first introduce yourself or get talking, casually and gently touch the outside of her right arm while at the same time verbally expressing something. The outside of a woman's arm is not intimate enough a place for the touch to feel strange or out-of-place, but at the same time it's a clear-cut sign that you're a personable, socially adept kind of guy. Don't be afraid to give it a try - you'll notice the benefits immediately.
2. Once you've started a conversation with a girl, or when you randomly find yourself chatting to a woman you really like the look of, it's important to keep up the physical contact. Doing so helps maintain the bond and rapport you've already created and also helps build it further, into mutually felt sexual attraction. You can use something called 'Stealth Tactility' to do this. Quite simply, stealth tactility involves making physical contact with the girl in a disguised way. For example, if she wants to go to the bar or bathroom but doesn't know the way, you can use stealth tactility by placing your hand on her shoulder, drawing her in a little closer, swivelling both of your bodies round until you face in the right direction, then point past other people or obstacles with your other hand to where she needs to go.
3. Lastly, always try to use a 'contact close' when you finish your conversation with a girl. For example, after swapping numbers or arranging to meet again, give her a kiss on the cheek or a hug and a kiss. Many men think that the hard work's been done once something's been arranged for a later date, but making physical contact before you part with a girl is always a great way of ensuring she remembers you and really cannot wait to see you again.
Tiffany Taylor is the female author of GuyGetsGirl, a special guide that reveals for the first time what goes on the minds of women AND how men can use special psychological and social techniques to attract and seduce them - regardless of their looks, bank balance or the car they drive. For more tips from Tiffany click here.
Posted by Jessica Watts at 12:34 PM
Photo by: broken_redeemed
3 No-Nos on a First Date
by Bob Grant, L.P.C. - "The Relationship Doctor"
Contrary to popular belief, the priority on a first date should be more about not making a mistake rather than making a good impression.
Face it, the very fact that a guy asks you for a date means you have already made a good impression.
Because of this, you don't have to impress him; rather, your main focus should be to NOT do these 3 things.
1) Don't make suggestions, let him be in charge
Hopefully, you will never be in the position of having a guy ask you for a date, and then show up at your door and ask you the question every woman dreads, "So, what would you like to do?"
To be fair, the reason some guys do this is because they are worried about planning something that you don't like. Rather than making a mistake in selecting the activity, they instead choose to avoid the risk of rejection.
Most, thankfully, know they need to plan the evening. If, however, you are asked about your preference, maintain your role as receptive female by saying, "I'm not sure, what did you have in mind?"
This will set the tone that HE is the man, and that it is his job to plan an evening to please you.
Don't worry about coming across as a snob, witch or worse. If he is so insecure that he needs you to plan the evening, good riddance. Better you discover this about him now than later.
2) Don't pay for the meal
Regardless of what part of the world you live in, nearly every man believes that a clear sign that a woman is not interested is her insistence in paying for her own meal.
Now, many women have confided to me that they have offered (insisted) to pay for their meal because they didn't want to give the impression that they were selfish.
While their intention is noble, men don't view it that way. Any first date is about a woman acting like a woman, not an equal. Leave the concept of fair at your work or school.
He didn't ask you out because he wanted to spend the least amount of money possible. On a first date, a man is more concerned that he can please you than he is about spending an extra $20-$50, I promise.
3) Above all, DON'T have Sex with him
One of the fastest ways to ruin a potentially great relationship is to introduce intimacy too soon. Men are very driven to prove their power to themselves.
They usually measure this by what (or whom) they have conquered. Frequently, when a man conquers something, he moves on to something else, and, once the chase has ended, he becomes bored.
A wise woman knows that the more a man invests in something, the more he values it. Sex is a prize he receives in return for his devotion and commitment. The more casual a woman makes sex, the more casual a man takes commitment.
For more information from Bob Grant click here.
Posted by Jessica Watts at 11:34 AM